Question: I’ve heard you say that entrepreneurship is the greatest personal development journey you’ll ever take. What are the key lessons that you’ve learned on your entrepreneurial journey?
1. You can’t always control everything. For example, you can’t control how people are going to perceive something that you put out there. I take any miscommunication or misunderstanding as an opportunity to communicate and get to understand one another one another better. It’s really important that you understand that you cannot control how people perceive you. People don’t perceive how you are you how you are, they perceive you how they are. They will see certain you through certain glasses. One person might say “that person is the most amazing person ever”. And then another person puts on their resentment glasses and says “that’s just another personal development fool”. You know, so you don’t know how it’s going to go. And and it shouldn’t really matter. Because if you’re called to do something, you’re always going to have critics.
2. Know from whom you’re going to accept criticism. The person that you accept criticism from is the person that you asked for their opinion on something. Let’s just say that you’re doing your marketing. And you’re going to be focusing on email marketing. If you have a person telling you that you shouldn’t do email marketing, who has never run their own business, who hasn’t actually run a successful email campaign, or who is just not a person who whom you trust, then you shouldn’t take that advice. If they’re saying you should doing email marketing, just because they weren’t successful in it doesn’t mean that you won’t be successful in it. Only take advice from people that you actually trust has your best interests at heart and isn’t just behaving out of their inner children’s insecurities.
3. Know who you let into your life. Be really careful about who you let into your inner circle, because people influence you, no matter how much you think that people don’t have influence over you, they do. The five people you spend the most time with will influence you in a certain way, whether you’re physically with them, or they’re inside your head, telling you that you’re not good enough or whatever. Be really clear about who those five people are, choose them carefully, and allow them proactively to influence you to become a better version of yourself.
These are the top three lessons, and there are all kinds of smaller lessons related to how you communicate with people and what kind of client care you have. We with all of our businesses, we are boutique operations, we deliberately are not going for volume. We don’t actually need as much money as generally as people project that they need, you know, they need the Lamborghini. Well, there’s nothing wrong with having a strong car, if that’s something that gives you joy. But to have a car like that, to impress other people is not actually an integrated reason to have that car in the first place. I’m not judging people about where they are in their integration journey. So please don’t think that, but what I am saying is that how you appear and who you actually are, they should pretty much be the same thing.
Of course, there are boundaries that you’re going to set, you’re not going to tell everybody your personal stuff. There are things you’re not going to disclose. Obviously, there’s personal experiences that you don’t want to talk about, and that’s fine. But don’t pretend to be one person here in front of the camera and another person outside of it. People are going to find out. You can tell if I’m authentic and genuine or if I’m not. Pretending something – for example, hiring a car for the day so you can take photos and put them on social media or going outside somebody else’s beautiful house and pretend like you own that house. Those people are very, very unintegrated, and their inner children are running the show. They feel like they need to somehow prove their worth by this kind of stuff, as opposed to actually being worthy and sharing their gifts from their worthy self.
1. Be as authentic as you possibly can, and don’t pretend you’re further along than you are. Know too that you’re going to evolve. Where you are today is not where you’re going to be in a year’s time. Allow yourself to be a beginner. This is something I tell my Integration Mentor Program students, the people who are training to become mentors under my guidance, it’s okay for you to just have started up. We don’t pretend to know everything. We actually work as people’s teammates, you know, people whose hand you could hold when you’re having a hard time or you’re going through a tough challenge. We don’t see ourselves as this entity who beams, truths and facts and advice on to somebody who’s below us somehow, we’re not like that at all. We are teammates, peers on the same level, yeah, we might be a couple of steps ahead, maybe in the inner parenting journey, or, you know, somebody comes to me and talks about their childhood abuse, you know, I might say, well, these are the things that have helped me overcome a lot of what you’re going through right now. We never talk down to people. We don’t see ourselves as authorities over other people. We may see ourselves as an authority on a specific subject, because we’ve worked through it. But we are not, in any case, in any way or form, “over” anybody else. And the same is true, when my mentoring students are starting out with their mentoring career, it’s OK to be clear that you’re starting out and that you’ve been working with your case studies and these are the kinds of results that they’ve got and that’s why your pricing might be a little bit lower initially. And then we work through it and continue to do price justification. We don’t believe in creating the perception of value and hiking prices up, we actually believe in creating value and doing price justification, in why you’re charging what you are charging.
2. Look for guidance. Look for mentoring, look for people ask people to help you.
3. Take notes. Always take notes. Don’t go into a meeting without a notebook or ask if you can record it. You’re learning. You’re learning how this world of business works. People who are further along than you are won’t have time to educate you throughout the process. Always take notes, educate yourself outside of meetings with other people, and make sure that you’re learning as much as you can.
4. Remember that you will fail and make that failure count. Fail forward, don’t just fail and then start beating up on yourself because you’re not where you think you should be or where you pretend to be on social media. That’s one of the reasons also don’t pretend anything. Just say where you are and what value you can bring from where you are right now. Because I guarantee wherever you are right now, you will offer value to other people who are following in your footsteps. You have value to offer. Be realistic about the value that you offer. And keep learning. Always keep learning.
So those would be my recommendations for those who are just starting on this path.
Just remember, as an introvert, you have something really deeply valuable to offer to people. Don’t be afraid to learn how to turn that inner wisdom that you have out to the outside world.
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